Love, sex and interminable pop-culture references

Category: Fiction

Fiction by ILB

Fiction: Dinosaur Boy

164 million years ago…

“You’re sure this is safe, right?”
“Safe? Oh, it’s not safe. Of course it’s not safe. We’re surrounded by dinosaurs. But we’ll be all right. I just wanted to be out here for a while.”

I lay back on the bed of ferns, grass having yet to exist. The heat of the day was scorching; the air thick, like breathing soup. Closing my eyes, I could hear the chittering of insects and distant call of dinosaurs looking for a mate. Everything around me I found completely intoxicating. Take me away here and I’d make the most beautiful fossil.

“I don’t understand why you even wanted to leave the pod,” he said nervously, tugging at a loose leaf as he sat by my side. “There are carnivores here. Wait too long and we’d be attacked by a Tyrannosaurus or…”
“Wrong time period, baby. In this era, the top predator is Allosaurus. And they won’t come here, into the open prairie. Even if they do, we can take shelter in a herd of sauropods. Diplodocus is pretty good. No natural predators.”
“But how would we get back to the pod?”
“It’s not going anywhere without us now, is it?” I let out a sigh. “We can take our time.”

I’d had the foresight to bring my sunglasses. It was bright, because of course it was. With them on, I could watch a Rhamphorhynchus winging its way through the wild blue. I hadn’t decided on wearing anything else, though, so I wasn’t. The pod was clean enough and we were the only ones here.

I will have to admit to the fact that my breasts look amazing with sweat dripping down them was one factor in doing so. He looked less comfortable naked, but still good. He’s always been a little awkward, whatever he’s in. Or out of.

“Aren’t you learning anything?” I asked dreamily. “Isn’t that what the institute wanted us to do?”
“Well, I learned that dinosaurs did a dawn chorus. That’s kind of new information.”
“They evolved into birds; what did you expect them to do, sing Uptown Funk?”
“You’re such a dick, Louise.”

Dick. Now there’s an idea.

“Look, there’s a Brachiosaurus,” I said, pointing one out. “Largest land animal ever. No predator’s going to come anywhere near a Brachiosaurus. We’ve got all the time we need. Now come here, and let me show you something.”

He hesitated, but we both knew where this was going. I could have sworn he’d been ready from the moment we stepped out of the pod. I’d even been wondering how good he felt under a brilliant Jurassic sun.

He let out a little “oof!” as he positioned himself between my glistening legs, making me giggle. I cleared my throat as he let out a silly shuddering gasp as the head of his cock teased my slit.

“Go on, you know you want to. When are we ever going to be here again?”
“You wanted to show me something?” he whispered as he slowly eased himself inside me.
“I lied,” I grinned. “But this is good too.”
He started moving his hips, perhaps a little too gently. I met his thrusts with little hip rolls of my own, though, at which he let out little grunts of pleasure. I’d been right, of course… he did feel good. Very good. Just the right size and shape to fill me up. I gave my inner muscles a little squeeze, at which he reared back.
“That’s good. Do that again.”


As he got faster, and I felt more and more full, I arched my back, my heaving breasts pointing skyward. He buried his face in my shoulder; I let myself enjoy every second, making my own noises now, our combined yelps and screams joining the soundscape of the dinosaurs’ roars and calls.

“Fuck, Louise! This is so…”
“…uh huh?… ooh!… what is it?”

And that was it. There was no going back any more. I felt him twitch as his cum started to fill me up. That’s the good stuff, and in that moment, it’s all I needed.


In the climate I was much sweatier than I would usually be, even after sex. He looks for all the world like he’s just stepped out of a shower, and from the look he’s giving me, I may well have too. We traipsed back through the prairie, stopping every now and again, before getting back to the pod.

I could practically feel his relief as I closed the pod door. I knew he didn’t feel completely safe. The decompression spray helped us to rinse off everything that covered us, and from somewhere, he found a towel to sit on.

“Right? Back home now? Or do you want to go somewhere else?”
“I don’t know. You choose. Somewhere we’re okay with being naked again. But I think I’ve had enough of dinosaurs.”
“Had enough of dinosaurs? There’s no such thing!”

He gave me a look.

“Fine then, no dinosaurs. I’ve got just the place.”

And as the pod vanished, the Jurassic era continued on outside, no dinosaur in the least disturbed by our momentary intrusion.

Poetry: The Pleasure of Agony

I used to write a lot of poetry.

It was, for a while, my ‘thing’. I’d sit in the library at breaktimes and write angsty love poems while Einstein and Lightsinthesky tried to solve the puzzle of what the inside of a black hole looked like. I never, for a single moment, considered actually approaching the girls I was writing poetry about – that was well beyond my capability – but I did put a lot of my pain into words.

Yes, I was that guy, before you ask. And, no, it wasn’t terrible poetry, it just wasn’t good.

Because it’s National Poetry Day, I’m sharing here one of the first poems I ever wrote, about one of the first crushes I ever had.

You are agony,
Yet the agony you bring I have to endure.
If I’ve decided that I love you then I’ll have to face the consequences.

Trying to look at you, then trying not to.
Trying to cry, then trying not to,
So I can try to look at you again.

The dark is rising,
And all I can think is:
Let them hit me, hurt me,
Let them batter me, beat me,
Let them do this to try
To make me cry.

You will lead me to salvation
By pulling me through the
That you don’t mean to bring.

It is through this agony
That I am sad,
Yet at the same time
I am so happy
Happy within the agony.

Fiction: Glimpse

It was quick. Very quick. A flash in the pan, as one might say. But I saw it. I definitely did see it. I can replay it in my mind, even now. Over and over and over again, it comes back to me. I know what she did, and I know how she did it. And even in my memory, the very thought still sets me on fire.

I shouldn’t have seen it. I know I shouldn’t. I wasn’t meant to be party to such a visual treat. I was at the back of the room; she was at the front. I was meant to be busy with something else – I even had an arm curled around the girl I was with. She had her head buried in my chest, listening to my heart beat. I’m pretty sure it was lulling her to sleep. It does that. And I know, deep down inside, that this was the girl I was meant to be concentrating on. I was. I really was.

But, while bending down to nuzzle her hair, my eyes flicked upwards. I caught the slightest glimpse of the girl in the other corner of the room. What she did was extraordinary – a spark of wanton electricity. I’m glad I had somewhere else to look, but nevertheless, I’d seen it. I couldn’t un-see it. My mind was trapped, caught in a loop. My thoughts went places they shouldn’t have gone. I felt dirty. Stained, unclean, wrong. But so, so good.

My girl murmured that my heartbeat had sped up. Not without cause.

[The above was originally submitted to the Eroticon 2012 anthology! Eight years later, here it is, dug up and dusted down, and presented for the first time here – hooray bonus content!]

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